Just One
by Gohanroxme
Summary: There were her feelings, the overwhelming sensations of sentiment that her body was always drowning in each and every time she was smothered my his mouth, by his touch, by the heat of his body. And then there were his feelings, his feelings that as much as she tried to, she could never feel. She could never sense them, never experience them because she realized that... GrUvia.


Just One

_A/N: Some more angsty romance because I love writing it . . . . :p R&R!_

**Disclaimer: I don't own Fairy Tail. If I did, my artwork would be beast. T_T**

She had thought that she would feel different when his hand was cupping her cheek, when her fingers were in his hair, when his lips were pressed against hers, against her neck, against her collarbone . . . she thought that there would be something else, something intimate that only his lips could tell her, that only his lips could _show_ her when he was on top of her like that, their breath in each other's faces and in sync with one another's.

Yes, she was hot. He was making her so unbearably hot with the excruciating ecstasy that he was causing her to experience. Her cheeks were flushed. Her blue locks of hair were tangled in his grip. She couldn't control her breathing. She could let him take her then and there.

But there was something missing. There was always something missing . . . she could always feel that something was gone, and it was something that she knew was supposed to be there, something she _needed_ from him . . . .

There were _her_ feelings, the overwhelming sensations of sentiment that her body was always drowning in each and every time she was smothered my his mouth, by his touch, by the heat of his body.

And then there were _his_ feelings, his feelings that as much as she tried to, she could never feel. She could never sense them, never experience them because she realized that . . . when he kissed her, he was just _kissing_ her, when he was touching her, it was only _touching_ . . .

There was never any love.

There was never any love, and though they had been seeing each other for the past two months or so, she had desperately been hoping that, alongside their amorous rendezvous, there would be a time where he would eventually feel for her as she did for him . . . where he would at least tell her, or show her, or give her some of the deep affection similar to what she had filled her heart with for him.

But he didn't. He never now, while he was kissing her as if his life depended on it, it was cold. No warmth whatsoever, no care, no . . . love.

It was something that tore mercilessly at her heart, something that caused her to bite her lip and push him gently from her body.

She witnessed the confusion and slight frustration in his dark eyes; she could understand why it was there: she was anxious to make him love her, to find some sort of emotion that he might've had for her, so she had been messing with their kisses a lot lately, making them linger, or more forceful, and on several occasions, even ending them.

Like she had just then, her gaze on him wavering and voice tentative, yet longing as she asked, "W-Will . . . there ever be a day, Gray-sama, were you would kiss me and mean it?"

No, she wasn't ashamed or remorseful for asking it, but it was the fact that she had to because she couldn't tell, that made her want to avert her eyes almost instantly. Would he be angry? Would he not want to see her anymore? That was a thought so painful that it nearly drew tears . . . .

His expression was weary, his body still hovering over hers and his hair slightly damp against his forehead. "Juvia . . . ." It was sighed . . . a discouraging sound that caused her heart to wrench in her chest.

She _did_ avert her eyes from his, her hand unconsciously lifting to coil shyly around a lock of her hair. "I . . . Juvia is not sorry for asking because i-it's something that . . . she'd like to know."

He bowed his head over hers. "Juvia, we're just . . . ." He trailed away, shutting his eyes.

Sleeping together. Yes. She knew. But he didn't have to confirm that, because there had always been a hope that he might just . . . .

She let her expectant thoughts trail away, swallowing thickly. "Yes, but . . . it isn't good for me . . . ." It wasn't . . . everything he gave to her wasunfeeling . . . the only goodness that came from it was that it was Gray-sama . . . it was Gray-sama that she was temporarily sharing a bed with.

He frowned at her, his gaze making her fidget. "What do you mean?"

She didn't reply. Gray was obviously having the better side of it all . . . because when she handling him, everything she did was out of love, out of what she felt for him. And if he didn't love her, kissing her didn't feel nice to her, it didn't feel right.

She didn't voice it, but he seemed to get what she was thinking: " . . . Juvia, do you want us to stop?"

Her eyes darted quickly to face him as she blurted a "No!" No. _No_, she didn't want to stop at all. The past two months had been the sweetest of her life. She didn't mind in the slightest if she was . . . was being used by Gray-sama because . . . it was Gray-sama and to share bed with him, even if he was _pretending_ that he liked her as more than a friend . . . it was total bliss.

He stopped hovering above her and rolled onto another space beside her on the bed, exhaling deeply.

She glanced sideways at him, anxiety churning within her stomach. "J-Juvia means . . . c-could you ever love her?" When he didn't answer her, she added, "Or is . . . she just somebody to . . . keep you company overnight?"

He didn't answer right away, and with each silent second that passed, she could feel a stinging in her eyes, a more intense throbbing in her throat.

No, she shouldn't cry. She _wouldn't_. Even if he couldn't ever love her, s-she wouldn't cry because at least . . . he'd kissed her, he'd let her in bed with him, at least . . . _she_ loved _him_.

Her breath hitched in her throat when something warm made contact with her hand. She glanced toward him, nervous, and noticed that it was his own fingers intertwined with hers.

"Juvia . . . I _could_ love you."

Her body jolted and she swore her heart nearly stopped. Her mind went completely white, and for several moments she couldn't think a thing. He could love her . . . ?

Her chest tightened and something dawned on her. If he could love her, hadn't he tried to? Didn't he think about how much it hurt her, even though she wanted to, to let herself to someone who she had thought would never love her?

"Then why don't you?" She wanted to bite her tongue after she had bitterly spat that out; she wanted to hold in the tears that were threatening to flood over, but she couldn't. Words were in her head faster than she could form them. "If Gray-sama says he could love Juvia, then why doesn't he yet? Do you have to sleep with someone first before you know if you love them? Is that it? Even though one could say that we've known each other thirteen years, y-you still can't . . . e-even though I . . . ."

Her breathing and voice were broken . . . cracked and jagged. The tears were hot on her face even though she didn't want them there at all; water manipulation grew trickier when she was distressed.

His warm (why couldn't their kisses be like that?) hand was placed tenderly on her left arm. "Juvia . . . ."

She didn't want to hear it yet because she still had to vent . . . had to let the pain out, even if it were all to build up again later.

"I . . . don't . . . I don't regret what we're doing, Gray-sama, and I'm not angry with it, but . . . could there be a kiss, _just one_, at least, were Juvia could feel your love . . . even if it's only as nakama love?"

He slowly moved nearer to her, his breath caressing her ear. "If I liked someone in Fairy Tail just as nakama, Juvia, I would never bother to kiss them at all . . . ."

She continued to sullenly stare at her thighs, until the realization of what he'd said plowed heavily into her chest. She looked up at him, her mouth dry. "G-Gray-sama . . . ."

His fingers were in her hair again, stoking, and she liked it when he did that.

"So maybe . . . my love for you isn't in that 'obsession zone' like yours it for me but," he pressed his lips to hers and she stiffened, stunned with the intense jolt it gave her, "I love you a whole damn lot."

To hear him utter those words to her, words that she'd waited so long for him to say, was . . . something that couldn't be described. There was a jumbled mixture of emotions surging through her, an overwhelming, muddled blend of sensations that made her want to cry some more, and laugh, and smile, and—

It was the fact that when he'd kissed her again, the love was impossible to miss. It was something passionate, affectionate, some less extreme than what she felt for him, but it was there . . . his love was there.

Had she always missed it? Or had he just been unsure of his feelings?

But it didn't matter anymore, anyway. At least, not in the giddy stupor she was in with him grinning kindly at her in the way she'd fallen for after she'd once again let him back on top of her.

Truth be told, the only thing that mattered then was that she was so madly infatuated with him and he loved her back.

_A/N: I'm hating on that last paragraph there . . . . Well, that's nothing new for me. :p So whaddaya guys think? Worth a review, hopefully? XD I know it. Because it took me a lot to get this published. Hardly any free WiFi in Antigua . . . . Thanks for reading!_


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